Monday, August 20, 2007

Correction of the Month: A pseudo-apology runs in the Guardian

The football column in London's Guardian recently ran a rather snide "correction." Have a read of Simon Hattenstone at full throttle. (Hat tip to the website

This column might have given the erroneous impression that it does not revere the legendary football manager, Sven Goran-Eriksson. The Guardian wishes to apologise to Mr Eriksson for any distress caused, and is happy to clarify that he is the manager of the season 2007-08, the only coach to have done the double with three clubs in three countries, the modern master tactician and Sweden's greatest babe magnet, bar none.

Svennis, I'm so, so, so, so, so sorry. I shouldn't have compared you to Death in The Seventh Seal, shouldn't have called you frigid, lily-livered and deluded, or harked on about your Cuban heels, or made gratuitous references to your Zeus-like libido, or been catty about the sweet dream that you were managing Manchester United, or questioned your ingenious scouting on YouTube. I was foolish, Svennis, an ignoramus. Glib. Just a stupid football fan wantonly giving you sticks.

My colleagues advised me to wait at least three games before apologising. But that would be wrong. One game in, and you already have my heart. I have not been so exhilarated since Dennis Tueart scored with overhead kicks in three successive games and Colin Bell streaked on to the pitch at half-time singing If I Said You Had A Beautiful Body (Would You Hold it Against Me).

Sven is playing fantasy football. In two weeks he has bought the ingredients for a divine footballing cake and baked it to holy perfection...

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